Want to cruise with 6,000 of your closest friends? Oasis of the Seas will let you

One of my longstanding dreams, which I was lucky enough to realize, was to sail a transatlantic crossing on the QE2. And I still remember how huge the ship seemed. Even with five days at sea, there wasn’t time to explore it all.

But these days, the QE2 — at just over 70,000 tons — would be considered a medium-sized ship. Even on the small side, as an increasing number of cruise ships have topped the 100,000 ton mark. At one point, no one wanted to build anything too big to fit through the Panama Canal, but that barrier has long since fallen.

And now, Royal Caribbean’s Oasis of the Seas is going to make those megaships look positively restrained: 220,000 tons, 1,081 feet long, 16 passenger decks. After a maiden four-day voyage, it will sail seven-day Eastern Caribbean cruises through the winter.

Glossy fold-out brochures sent to travel agents tout the huge number of activities on the ship. And the list is impressive: a production of the musical Hairspray, an ice show, a Cirque du Soleil type aerial show, along with zip lines, rock climbing walls and “Flowriders” for onboard surfing.

One thing the cruise line doesn’t highlight is the fact that the Oasis of the Seas is designed to hold 5,400 people, and 6,300 with 3rd and 4th in the cabins. Which means that some of the waits for these activities could be as impressive as the ship itself.

Royal Caribbean is attempting to help manage all these people and activities by a reservation system that will allow guests to make reservations up to 90 days in advance, for restaurants, entertainment, activities and the spa. Which for organized people who are good at advance planning should be a blessing. And for last-time procrastinators, something else entirely.

Presumably, some tweaking will be in order. But clearly there will be tradeoffs. And it remains to be seen whether the people who are thrilled to have their activities and evenings planned out in advance are offset by the people who can’t get into any resturants or shows they wanted.

Also, of 24 restaurant choices, 12 carry some sort of surcharge, ranging from $4.95 a person, up to $75 for the chef’s table, with wine included. There’s even a “Cupcake Cupboard” that sells individual cupcakes for various prices, along with an ala carte ice cream parlor. (Didn’t ice cream used to be free?)

Fortunately, tenders will not be a problem. Royal Caribbean says they have worked out that the ship will dock at all ports. Which should make disembarking less of an adventure, except perhaps for those adventurous souls who always like to be amongst the first off the ship to maximum time ashore. And no doubt shopping in port half an hour before the Oasis sails is also likely to be an experience. Especially in Phillipsburg, St Maarten, population 1,228. (The whole county’s population is only about 32,000)

In fact, I fully expect some passengers will take advantage of port days to try to explore the ship in a less crowded state, and to experience some of the more popular attractions and restaurants.

There is still some space on all but the December 1 maiden voyage, which could be because of the economy. Royal Caribbean has been asking prices that are much higher than their other ships, and 2,000 cabins are a lot to fill. No doubt too, some regular cruisers will watch the early reports before plunking down money.

A few issues and questions come to mind: Not losing family members could be a challenge, presumably made easier with walkie-talkies, as cellphones aboard ships are notoriously expensive. In addition, heaven help passengers who leave a book or sunscreen in their cabin, as it could be a long hike back. (Wonder how long it will take the cruise line to come up with a paid porter-valet service to retrieve such items?)

And my father, a veteran of countless cruises, has asked me: Just how long do you think it takes for an elevator to travel 16 decks with every one of the buttons pushed?