As the travel industry keeps coming up with new and creative ways to separate passengers from extra dollars, one of the airline industry’s ideas — priority boarding — has been taken over by an unlikely competitor, Greyhound.
And yes, that is Greyhound Bus Line, (I know that many people for years have referred to Southwest Airlines as the Greyhound of the skies…although these days they offer more services than many legacy carriers.)
In Greyhound’s case, the additional charge is only $5, and is only available in select markets, up to 45 minutes prior to departure. While this may not affect many of us, it does make you wonder, what or who is next?
Here’s a few potential fee ideas, some tongue-in-cheek, but you never know. Being ridiculous never stopped many in the industry.
Priority Lavatory Line — No one likes to wait in the aisle, especially when it’s close to landing time and the seatbelt sign may come on any minute. Maybe some carrier will offer a “Fast-Pass” to move to the front of the line at all times.
Priority Debarkation — Yes, we’ve all been on planes where the flight attendant says “There are some people with tight connections, please allow them to get off first.” This announcement sometimes, but not always, mitigates the rush for the exits. This one would be tough, however, as flight attendants might find themselves having to tackle folks trying to sneak off first for free.
Priority Hotel Check-in — Many hotels already have special lines for members of their frequent stay program. But perhaps others would pay to jump to the front of the line, especially after a long flight.
Priority Onboard Service — First drink service, and first refills, first choice of buy-on-board food. This priority pass could even come with your first drink or snack included.
Priority Overhead Bin Space — For an additional fee passengers get guaranteed space in the overhead bin, no matter when they board. (This could be accomplished easily by selling a limited number of passes per flight, and keeping a few bins empty except for people holding those passes.) Some overhead bins already are unavailable due to safety or electronic equipment. Of course, reserving some bins for paying customers does mean even more of a musical chairs problem for the rest of the cabin.
No doubt there are more. Many airlines already in theory offer Priority Luggage service to their elite and front of the plane travelers, but the problem with selling such a service is that it is an inexact science, as anyone who has ever waited a very long time for “priority luggage” can attest. (On the other hand, airlines’ charging to check luggage hasn’t stopped them from losing it, so you never know.)
I am sure you readers can come up with more creative ideas. What Priority service would you pay for?
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Tongue and cheek or not I would pay for a priority line for the bathroom. I can’t tell you how often I’ve almost missed a flight or bus because I was waiting in line for the bathroom while it was being cleaned!
In thinking about your priority drink fee, it makes me wonder if someday soon people will be allowed to pay to bring beverages through TSA. It would certainly be interesting if the almighty dollar trumps national security.
How about seat cushion upgrades for flotation purposes (you know, in the unlikely event of a “water landing”)?
Someday airlines might implement a surcharge for on-time departure/arrival.
Perhaps an automatic 15% service charge for parties of six or more?
Perhaps we’ll have to buy pollution credits in a cap-and-trade marketplace before we can fly!
Nothing is too absurd for airline execs. Remember when we used to joke that they’d start charging to use the lavatories?? Or that there would someday be standing-room-only sections aboard aircraft? Both of these are seriously being pursued today (albeit outside of the USA for now)…
Caesars Palace, if not all of Harrah’s properties offer early checkin. I used it on my last trip to Caesars Palace. All I had to do was sign up at their website, and they send me a text message with a request to reply. Once they receive my reply, I just go to the Bell Desk after noon, pick up my keys and I’m off to my room.
Adults Only section – no screaming toddlers, no seat-kickers, etc.
They have balls to think about that when there are bus companies popping out of the wood work and charging a fraction of what they charge. I just went to NYC from Washington DC. Roundtrip cost $50 and that was on a brand new bus with clean bathrooms and wi-fi!
Tongue in Cheek H—, shame on you for giving the airlines more ideas for how to abuse their customers!