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Laugh-in Laughter makes the world go round.

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Old 09-15-2006, 12:09 PM   #1
cole75
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Location: Thunder Bay, Ont.
Age: 39
Posts: 2,790
Rep Power: 89 cole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennescole75 has just been invited to the lav with Ralph Fiennes
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'Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U togather
Female: Oh really, because if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put F and U
together.'

'Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell??'

'He says "Where have you been all my life"
She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

'Male: I would die for you...
Female: Prove it'

'Male: I'm all you've got good lookin'
Female: then I must not have alot'

'Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore'

'Male: So what do you do for a living?
Female: Female impersonator.'

'Male: "Is this seat empty?"
Female: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

'Male: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Female: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

'Male: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Female: "It's in the phone book."
'Male: "But I don't know your name."
Female: "That's in the phone book too."

"What sign were you born under?"
"No Parking."

"I know how to please a woman."
"Then please leave me alone."

"Haven't we met before?"
"Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic."

"I want to give myself to you."
"Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

"I can tell that you want me."
"Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you... to leave."

"Hey, baby, What's your sign?"
"Stop."

"Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
"Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

"May I see you pretty soon?"
"Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?"

"Your body is like a temple."
"Sorry, there are no services today."

"I'd go through anything for you."
"Good! Let's start with your bank account."

"I would go to the end of the world for you."
"Yes, but would you stay there?"

"Your place or mine?"
"Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

'After hearing a pickup line:
I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

'If you are looking at a girl and she says "What are you looking at?"
say "I thought you were good looking, but I was mistaken."

'Q: Does beauty run in your family?
A: It obviously doesn't in yours!'

'Q: What's your name sexy?
A: Taken!'

'Q: Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again?
A: Yeah, but this time don't stop!'

'Q: I think you're the best looking girl in here.
A: Really? Well, I'd better go find the best looking guy then, hadn't I!'

'He: Your legs go clear up to your ass.
She: Most peoples' do!'

'Q: Can I buy you a drink?
A: Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!'

'"You look like a dream."
Response: "Go back to sleep."'

'Him: What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?
Her: What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?'

'"I can see forever in your eyes."
Response: "But all I can see is never in yours."'

'"I looked up beautiful in the thesaurus today and your name was included."
Response: "Thanks! Hey, I saw your name next to jerk."
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