|05-01-2006, 11:38 AM||#1|
I hate driving
Über Über Poster
Member since: Mar 2005
Location: Stevenson Ranch
Rep Power: 163
One day, in line at the cafeteria, Bob says to Stanley,
"My elbow hurts like crazy. I guess I'd better see a doctor."
"Listen, Bob, you don't have to spend that kind of money, " Stan replies.
There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine
sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about
it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars... a lot cheaper than a doctor."
So Bob fills a small jar with his urine and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits
ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample.
He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a
printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid
heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Here is a doctor's certificate
for your employer"
That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Bob began
wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a urine
sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and some water
out of his favorite fishing hole, just for good measure. He then went back to
Wal-Mart, eager to test the computer. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his
concoction, and waits. In ten seconds the computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop fishing, your elbow will never get better.
And, as always ... Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.
|Thread||Thread Starter||Forum||Replies||Last Post|
|Two classic groaners||stephen_s||Laugh-in||3||04-23-2007 01:42 PM|
|Classic joke||stephen_s||Laugh-in||11||01-08-2007 04:26 PM|
|Another classic joke - Strongman contest||stephen_s||Laugh-in||0||06-12-2006 11:51 AM|
|Another classic joke||stephen_s||Laugh-in||0||01-12-2006 08:20 AM|
|Today's Joke (A variation of an old joke)||stephen_s||Laugh-in||0||10-16-2005 01:45 PM|