View Full Version : New Living Will Form

12-13-2006, 07:29 PM
New Living Will Form

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

______a Martini

______a Margarita

______a Scotch and soda

______a Bloody Mary

______a Vodka and Tonic

______a glass of Chardonnay

______a Steak

______Lobster or crab legs

______The remote control

______a bowl of ice cream

______The sports page



It should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

At this point, it is time to call the New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses to toast the good times we have had.

Signature: ___________________________

Date: ___________________________

NOTE: I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The patients are happier and they have a lot more visitors. Some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes . If anyone knows the name of this happy place PLEASE pass it on

(Not my time yet. I just asked for all of the above!)

silver cloud
12-14-2006, 09:16 AM

That is hilarious! I just made out a new will, maybe I should add that codicil to it? ha! :D

12-14-2006, 10:58 AM
Atta girl, Carrie! I am in total agreement with every word.

12-18-2006, 10:44 AM
Some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes

cute!! I want to know where this place is too!! :lol: