Children in first class? 3 suggestions for the kids ‘up front’

by Christopher Elliott on June 23, 2009

The most embarrassing moment of my life? That’s easy.

Our son, Aren, had just turned one and we were flying from New York to London on an airline whose name I’ve promised never to mention.

We’d managed to score an upgrade — seats 1A and 1B — and to ensure Aren had a pleasant trip, we offered him a nip of Benadryl. Most kids fall asleep when they’re given an antihistamine.

Not mine.

The medication had the exact opposite effect: Aren turned hyper, tearing down the aisle of the first class cabin, shrieking and bumping other passengers. He woke up the person sitting next to us and drooled on the passenger behind us.

All of which bring me to this week’s topic: Kids in first class. Should we or shouldn’t we? And if so, when?

Allow me to state my completely unbiased opinion right up front. No. We should not. At least not mine. I downgraded myself on the flight home, that’s how badly I felt for the other London-bound passengers that day.

What was I thinking, trying to bring a toddler into first class?

I’m not alone.

· An overwhelming majority of air travelers to a recent survey by Skytrax — 9 in 10 respondents — said families with children should be seated in a separate section on flights, presumably not in first class.

· Another poll by corporate travel agency Carlson Wagonlit found that business travelers, who are most frequently found in the business- and first-class cabins, believe crying babies are the second-most annoying aspect of air travel. The first? Air travelers who carry too much luggage on board.

· Several years ago, a United Airlines flight attendant just came out and said it: no children in first class. A passenger disagreed, sued the airline — and lost.

Last week in this column, we argued about whether kids belong on planes, and resolved that although many of us would like to keep the little ones from flying, it’s just not practical. This week, as promised, we’re having a more nuanced and civil discussion about children in the good seats.

Well, sort of. I asked some of my readers for their opinions of kids in first and got an earful.

“No, no, no, no, no,” says Mona Palmer, an administrative assistant from Friendswood, Tex. “First class tickets are too expensive to have the investment destroyed by an unruly kid whose parents think they’ve paid for the privilege of ignoring their kids’ rotten behavior.”

The other side of this argument is equally vehement.

“Give me a break,” says Jennifer Thomas, who describes herself as the owner of a public relations firm and mom. “These questions about kids and flying are frankly disrespectful. Let’s see, kids in first class or terrorists allowed to fly on planes? Or how about just plain rude adults who take to the friendly skies? I would take a child any day over previously mentioned. Why not ask questions about those two audiences?”

Kids! Kids! Can’t we just get along?

Instead of spending the rest of this story fighting (as entertaining as that might be to some of you, dear readers) let’s instead focus on three solutions to this problem.

No children in first class
One of the most persuasive arguments for limiting first class to adults is that the premium cabin is essentially an adult product. Which is to say, it’s difficult for a youngster to appreciate a wine list or a gourmet meal. It’s just no place for kids. Plus, it’s pricey — even if you’re using miles to upgrade. Rosanne Skopp, a grandmother who says she “really loves kids,” puts it this way: “If I’m going to be sitting next to a screaming baby, at least let me feel good that I haven’t paid for a first class ticket, only to be tortured.” No airline that I’m aware of has banned children from first class or business class, but it wouldn’t be accurate to say any of them have opened their arms wide to their junior passengers, either. Like a five-star restaurant or a luxury resort, the first class cabin is not particularly welcoming to young fliers. Or, for that matter, their parents.

Age limit for premium seats
Here’s another suggestion: If we can’t ban minors, then let’s at least prevent the littlest passengers from sitting “up front.” Babies and toddlers are too disruptive to the other passengers, who are paying a premium for their seats. “No one under 12 should be in first class,” says Richard French, an anesthesiologist from Christchurch, New Zealand, who by way of full disclosure, is himself a father. “I pick that age because kids are essentially self-caring by that age and that is the age that airlines start charging an adult fare. It is really depressing when you have treated yourself to a very expensive fare, to have a three-year-old running up and down the aisle.” I can’t argue with that. During my research for this story, I heard whispers that several international airlines had informal age-limit policies for first-class passengers, but they were difficult to confirm.

Let the kids fly
The overwhelming number of travelers I spoke with said kids should be able to fly in first class if their parents could afford to pay the freight. But they were quick to add that they expected the children to behave. “Of course children should be allowed in business- or first class,” says Frank Nowicki, a retiree from Winter Haven, Fla. “As long as the parents have raised their children properly — as far as behavior goes — there should never be a problem on a flight.” Still, Nowicki admits that’s not always possible, and has seen “many occasions” when parents have allowed their offspring to run wild on a flight. “Don’t blame the children,” he says. “Blame the adults for their permissive ways and their lack of parenting skills.” But how do you mandate good parenting on a plane? A multiple-choice quiz? Social references? Even peer pressure —dirty looks and all — isn’t always enough to stop these indulgent parents from boarding a flight, or buying an upgrade for their brood.

I’m afraid this is one of those instances when new rules and regulations, even with the best of intentions, would not end the problem of disruptive kids in first class. This is ultimately a parent’s decision that the entire first-class cabin must live with.

But before buying a premium ticket, here are a few useful questions to answer: Can my child behave like a first-class passenger? If not, do I have the parenting skills to contain a meltdown? Is it really worth the hassle — not to mention the money?

I’ve already answered those questions. My son Aren, who today is a reasonably well-mannered first grader, now has two siblings: a four-year-old brother with a penchant for practical jokes and a slightly hyperactive two-year-old sister. Even if I could, I would never inflict them on another first class passenger. Ever.

But if you think your kids can do better, I have just four words for you: Welcome to first class!

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  • http://cigarcruises.net Clay

    If we apply this sort of logic, we should also ban people without children from buying Mini-vans and SUV’s. The largest difference being my option would actually reduce emissions, where children in first class are just supporting the economy.

  • Jennifer

    Well, I’m going to Jamaica in a few weeks from Newark with my 5 year old and 1 year old and we used miles to get our first class tickets. There was availability for mileage tix for the same flight in economy but the biz seats were actually less miles due to availability and Continental’s ridiculous system. I would have been crazy to not do it. We are 2 adults traveling with 2 children. Both are extremely well behaved when we have traveled in the past. Of course you never know what will happen but still…I plan on preparing my 5 year old and telling him what the rules are (you must stay in your seat, do not talk to the other people on the plane unless they seem to want to talk to you, etc). I also plan on having movies for him to watch and games he can play on my laptop. I think the problem isn’t children on planes. It’s the fact that the parents don’t come prepared and don’t prepare their children. But to be honest with you, that’s what we see EVERYWHERE now and not just on planes. Been to a restaurant lately? A movie?

    I also do want to remind you that there are plenty of rude adults out there and those actually seem to be the ones making the biggest stink about children on planes. How many of us have sat next to an adult who didn’t shower, ate something smelly, won’t get the hint when you want to sleep and not talk, uses YOUR armrest, is rude to the flight attendants, doesn’t listen to the “no electrical devices,” puts his luggage in your overhead compartment b/c he’s sitting in the back and doesn’t want to carry it all the way through the plane, takes off his seatbelt and starts to get up before he’s supposed, etc. You get my drift.

    Instead of focusing on children, how about we just focus on how people in general need to treat others with more respect and common courtesy? If everyone learned to do that more often, the children might actually follow our example.

  • Joe

    My recommendations are as follows:

    1. No Children under the age of 3 in first class or business class on flights that are longer than 1 ½ hours or depart after 10 pm.

    2. Children are the responsibility of the parent regardless of age

    3. Passengers in general (adults and children) are responsible for their actions on the plane.

    In this area my biggest complaint is the crying on the red eye coming from the west coast and the overnight flights going to Europe. When you have a crying baby next to you it doesn’t matter if you are in first – business- coach – or steerage… it’s going to be a long flight.

    I have a much bigger problem (no pun intended) and a much more frequent occurrence with large people that take up their seat and half of mine. I can put on my noise canceling headphones to muffle out sound, I can’t shrink the person in the seat next to me that is using two belt extenders….

  • laura

    Have three kids, all well travelled. Never took them in first class. Kids mostly do not appreciate the ‘extras’ that the huge cost difference goes toward and like many others (and although my kids are usually well behaved) I wouldn’t subject them on their off-days to anyone else.

    That being said, there are many adults I’ve encountered in first class that I’d like to send to the back of the plane as well.

  • Ron

    My daughter, now age 13, flew for the first time in First Class from Houston to Newark on a Continental widebody when she was 3. It was an international configuration with personal viewscreens, which were only available up front in those days.

    She was warned before the flight that where she was sitting she was going to need to be on her best behavior. “Just like when you go to school,” is how my wife put it.

    We kept a close eye on her, but there was nothing for us to worry about. She did fine. My “little one” has now flown to Austraila and Puerto Rico on separate trips up front. She did fine on both and acted like a little lady.

    Don’t get me wrong, my daughter is no angel, she still gets into her fair share of mischief…..it is just that with proper preparation, any child can be prepared for what kind of behavior is expected of them up front.

    I will add that I think that at three or four years old is the youngest that you might expect the kids to understand how important it is to behave……My wife said it best, “Just like you are in school”

  • Frank

    · An overwhelming majority of air travelers to a recent survey by Skytrax — 9 in 10 respondents — said families with children should be seated in a separate section on flights, presumably not in first class.
    ==============================================================

    Skytrax, great website. What I’ve observed over the years is interesting. “Parents” in FIRST, kids in coach. “Kids” in FIRST, parents in coach. The “women” in FIRST, the guys in coach….etc..etc. The summer months show an increase in kids in FIRST. I just had two unaccompanied minors in FIRST the other day. Well behaved.
    Crying infants, ohhhh boy. Especially on late night flights or red eyes. I’ve placed a blanket on the toilet seat of the lavatory and said, “want some privacy?” many times.

  • L. C.

    Age should be left out of this discussion entirely. No one on a plane should be screaming, running in the aisles, drooling on other passengers, climbing over the seats, kicking the seats, throwing toys, etc. I would like to see the airlines establish and enforce a civilized code of conduct for all passengers on a plane. And no, of course this should not be necessary. However, since it obviously is necessary, put the expectations of a civilized society in writing, communicate these expectations clearly to all passengers, and fine or remove violators (and their parents) from the flight at the first available opportunity, with no refunds.

  • occasional traveler

    It sounds like this needs to be determined on a kid-by-kid basis. My husband and I were upgraded to business on a flight from Sao Paulo to Chicago. Business class was pretty much empty so we moved over to three empty seats, strapped in our little 1.8 mth old, fed her a ton of food and milk to make her sleepy and then she slept 8 of the 9hr flight. People complimented us on how quiet she was. So it is entirely possible to do — but she also had the temperament to endure intl flights with little screaming, kicking, or crying. Would I do it again now that she is 2.5? Not so sure. I think reasonable parents should consider their fellow passengers before making that decision.

  • Bodega

    Put all the kids in first and business and all the business travelers in the back. Wanna bet which group acts up first!

    Kids are kids and can’t often control themselves. Adults on the other hand can and don’t. I feel sorry for the young child who becomes uncomfortable on the plane. I don’t feel sorry for the adult that acts out and I seem to see that far more these days.

    The front of the plane is for anyone who can afford the cost of the ticket or has the mileage to upgrade. The comment that the front of the plane is where business people sit is bunk!

  • Carrie Charney

    Amen, Bodega!

  • http://www.trekaroo.com thelees3

    I’m a bit put-off by your comment about parents have allowed their offspring to run wild on a flight. “Don’t blame the children,” he says. “Blame the adults for their permissive ways and their lack of parenting skills.”

    New walkers who’ve just gotten their walking legs cannot contain themselves and sit in a seat. I don’t care what kind of parenting skills are employed, you’re going to either have a child walking in the aisles or one screaming to get out of their seat to walk. I personally prefer the cute waddling toddler cruising up and down the aisles better than a screaming unhappy one. But then again, if people want a screaming child, let me know! If passengers are annoyed by the patrolling of the aisle by toddlers, I would suggest installing some sort of treadmill for new toddlers to occupy their new found legs.

  • DCTA

    I’m all for children in Bus/First as long as they actually buy a ticket and are not on someone’s lap. you want to bring your kid in first, please pay at least what I did for the treat of sitting in those nice big seats. That way, when your kid misbehaves I’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that you paid a premium for his/her experience.

  • Ronnie

    How about “special needs” people in first class that behave like five year olds? I was on a flight with a family of three–the parents and a daughter who was 30+ going on 5.

    The parents sat in the row behind her, leaving her to sit next to me. She was rude, threw her food, screamed and yelled about “Harry Potter living in her closet” and stomped around the cabin when the lavatory was occupied and she wanted to use it.

    One of the FA’s nudged the parents (at my behest) to switch seats with the daughter. The mother did and all I got was an earful about how some people don’t have the patience for “beautiful” people like her kid.

  • Kevin

    I don’t know why a parent would need first or business class. I used to wish I could afford to fly up front, so I could actually stretch my legs and maybe, for once, sleep. But now that we have a little girl, I hardly have time to get uncomfortable. What once was a long 10-12 hours of ignoring the movie, trying to hear the music program over the jet noise, and getting bored with the book I brought, is now, except for nap time, really quite busy interacting with our daughter. The hours fly by! So maybe that’s the parent’s real error– not being too permissive, but just not engaging with the child and spending time with him/her.
    Is it really a problem for people for children to cruise the aisle? When my daughter was 1, she got a lot of walking practice between the two sets of lavatories. I felt like we were famous, everyone knew our faces… and they smiled.

  • alavery7

    Is this a free country and a capitalist economy, or isn’t it?

    1. Rude individuals of any age should be politely corrected, through their guardians if they are a minor, regardless of their seat assignment.

    2. If a premium service is available, it should available to all ages except where doing so would be in volation of the law (such as serving alcohol to minors).

    I don’t understand how people can continue to call for airlines to restrict the freedoms of some (parents and minors, in this case) to protect the convenience of others. If *you* are bothered by a baby’s cries, *you* should buy noise cancelling earphones, the same as I am not allowed to prohibit people from talking on bluetooth headsets while standing in front of me in line.

    If a child is kicking a seat, or misbehaving in a way that would also be inappropriate for an adult, the parents and flight staff should work together to resolve, and the other passengers should raise any objections politely with the flight staff.

    Quit the kid bashing. They and their parents have every right to fly that you do.

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